Monday, February 10, 2014

Oops...

I've been forgetting to write about my mommy-hood journey!! This may be a long post, so if you are also pregnant, I recommend going to the bathroom, grabbing a drink and a snack, pop in to pee once more, then relax in front of your computer screen.

At the 9 week mark, I discovered one of my first pregnancy symptoms - constipation.  Five whole days of just peeing.  Every time I ate something, I felt I was going to hurl, and that it wouldn't be food coming back up.  And nothing was helping.  I drank prune juice, coffee, water, tea, bread, and took stool softeners.  It. was. awful.  THANKFULLY that has been the only terrible constipation so far this pregnancy.

About 11 weeks into our pregnancy, an just after Christmas, we shared with the world that we were expecting.  It was almost surreal at being completely terrified about becoming a mother, and then once word got out, it felt better knowing we had so much love and support on our side.  I made adorable Christmas cards and sent it to family and friends far and wide, and then shared the baby side on Facebook.

13 weeks in, Derek got his car stuck in our subdivision.  I went out to help (I drove while he and neighbors pushed) for about an hour.  Came back inside and ended up with a wretched cough that I technically still have.  Ended up with having the flu for just over a week.  But I was an awesome badass and shot an entire wedding on my own in the thick of it!

I've thrown up now more times than I can count.  I hate throwing up.   Absolutely hate it.  I cry ever time.  Most of it has actually been from coughing so hard, or from my sinuses draining and I gagged - inducing the vomiting.  Knock on wood though - I haven't thrown up in almost a month!!

At about 15 weeks, I was laying on my stomach with my hands on my belly DETERMINED to feel baby.  I was convinced that because baby was about the size of an orange that I would feel it.  Not so much.  Every once in a while around that time I felt what I thought could be a flutter, or a movement, but was never sure.

At about 16 weeks, I finally started to pop out and look pregnant instead of just chubby.  My pants definitely didn't fit any more.  Yoga pants and leggings have started to become my best friend.

Now to current events!!  Today, was supposed to be 18 weeks, 2 days.  We went in this morning for our ultrasound.  Baby looks absolutely perfect.  Round head, fingers, toes, no extra appendages, big nose (of course, it's a Hammond, it's gonna have a big nose!)  and a cute round belly.  Stubborn too… we were trying to get a profile of baby, and he/she wouldn't move.  So I sat up, did a twistie crunch and laid back down…baby turned, but the wrong direction!!  Heart beat was measuring about 138 bpm while we were in there.  I held Derek's hand the whole time.  Also, I'm apparently measuring about 19 weeks.

**Side note** In my previous post, it said I was about 7 weeks, due July 7th.  I have no idea why that information never stuck in my head.  I've been counting July 13th as my due date, so today came as a shock that I was measuring right on cue with July 7/8th.  Don't remember them telling me at all in my last appointments. Must have been early baby brain!

Yesterday, I was still freaking out about being a mom, taking care of another human being, how much I am giving up for this baby, about how it's not going to be about me anymore (which does kinda stink).  I've had to give up a lot of photography income (and possibly more) that we need to survive, and not only will that money be gone, but we will have more to pay out because of baby in diapers, clothes, possibly formula.  It's so overwhelming and honestly,  I wasn't feeling like a baby is the best thing in the world.

But looking at those tiny feet with the tiny toes, the perfectly curved spine, the adorable round little head, the life that Derek and I created together,  I am determined to figure it out, to make it work.  To be the best damn mother I can be to this little body of chromosomes.

Wednesday we find out the gender of the baby.  I have the envelope with the gender ultrasound in my purse.  I must admit, I did try to peek through when I was in the car.  Dang envelopes and their security printing.  I couldn't make out a darn thing.  I'll keep you posted.


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